Poetry: Lactose Intolerant Bird

May 10, 2013

It’s been a bit of a long week. 
Work has taken over my life, in all of the ways. 
My diet has gone from healthy to restricted, my body has gone from temple-like (HA!) to battered and bruised. And my mind, oh, my mind, it has been tortured to within an inch of its understanding,
There is only 14 days left to become the most awesome student ever, so I’m crossing all my fingers and all my toes in the hope that it will make me the best. (Except I need to type so I probably wont be crossing my fingers… and… I need to… walk… and put on shoes.) VOID EXPRESSIONS, WOHOO!

So whilst my mind has been frazzling, some little ray of hope inside my brain has created this little gem. 

A letter to the lactose intolerant bird.


To the bird that pooped on the rump of my car,
I forgive your slippery bowls.
I can understand your need to feel relief, 
For you ate the product of cows.

I know this fact to be as true as beak and wing,
For the poop was strange and lumpy.
I feel your pain when it comes to milk and cheese,
You must be very uncomfy.

But my dear bird, I must speak my troubles, 
You did defile my sweet ride.
For the moment you eased your chocker-block bum,
I’ll tell you, I sobbed and I cried.

You owe me a car wash and a birdy word,
That you’ll never touch cheese again.
I’m sorry to be mean, to be frank and harsh,
But I have a car to maintain.

Yours respectfully,
(I’m not taking the micky)
The owner of the white, blue and pooey mini. 


ALSO THESE TWO THINGS HAPPENED:
Have a nice weekend. 


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Druid Georgi

My name's Georgi. I'm all about stories, nature and not being a horrible person. Grab a coffee, scroll around and laugh at my expense. My life motto is, 'Imagine if I'd done tried or whatever.'